why so noisy & nosy?

What do you think the name "칼바위" implies?
("칼"="knife" ; "바위"="boulder")

Yup, you've got it.
We neglected our sharp intuition and decided to try this intense (excruciating) hiking (rock climbing) trail. But the aftermath was a pleasant surprise in many ways.

Needless to say about the great sense of accomplishment along with the striking views from the top of 북한 mountains, I actually got to spend the entire Sunday for rehabilitation--the very historical day where I saw not a single familiar face and cooked all three meals for myself.

Moreover, I got to have the first sincere, legitimate prayer for the first time in the embarrassing 3 months of apathy.


어찌하여 "정상적인 24시간" 안에서는 10분의 고요도 허용하지 못했단 말이더냐, 킴현아?!

giving thanks

Korean Thanksgiving (추석) break ends tonight.

This Chuseok was special in many ways because:
1. There was unimaginable amount of rain--a record breaker near a century.
2. Due to two deadly storms from earlier this month, prices for pretty much all edible Kindom Plantae skyrocketed. (e.g., we bought one binding of spinach for eight folds of its price in August).
My grandma says she's never seen vegetables this expensive in her memory of 70 years.
3. Fruits are supposed to be "party-in-my-mouth" good around this time, but many were rather bland. Why? Refer to the first sentence of #2.
4. First generation of smart phone applications for tracking highway traffic.


This Chuseok was special to me in many ways because:
1. This was one of the very rare occasions that I spend it with my family in Korea.
2. I didn't go in lab for 1.5 weeks (explanation: two weekends+Holiday break+1 vacation day+2 school days).
3. I monitored every step of making songpyeon (rice cake that highlights the Holiday; turkey-equivalent). Therefore, I was very attached to every one of them and they are my babies.


See? These little cuties are chestnuts. One of the best gifts of the Fall's got to be the opportunities to "harvest" chestnuts that you never planted.(-_-) I spent an hour at the 성주mountains searching every corner under the chestnut trees and got a bag full of nuts and two legs full of mosquitoe bites.

Sometimes, they are just blatantly out in the open world, yelling, "take me!"

And look at our busy cameo ;)

Then, our cute little chestnusts are steamed and mixed with brown sugar to become the 속, the inner part of songpyeon. (The outer part is the sticky rice cake).

The final draft below...

Who's inside?

Familiar faces :)

끄덕끄덕.
Thumbs up!

"Life is all memory except for the one present moment that goes by so quick you can hardly catch it going."

Tennesse Williams, The Milk Train Doesn't Stop Here Anymore

그런 생각을 해본 적 있는가.
삶이 전부 기억이라는 생각,
잡을 수 없을 만큼 재빨리 지나가는 단 한순간을 제외하고는 전부 기억이라는 생각.
정말로 삶은 전부 기억이다...지나가는 매 순간만 빼고.

testing123

ah ah mic (phone app) testing
one two three ♬

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blind photographer

Isn't it an oxymoron--a photographer.blind?

I think not.
They may be better at capturing the bigger world,
the world that surpasses the mere surface level beauty.


e.g., You don't have to see the autumn sky to know that it's autumn :-)

the powerful 'b'

비 떨어지는 소리를 들으며 대전역에 도착하고
뭔가 jazzy한 느낌으로 에스컬레이터를 올라가는데
중3정도로 보이는 남자아이가 위에서 내려온다.
그아이 티셔츠에는 Boston이라고 써져있다.
난 꿈속을 보는듯한 기분으로 그 글자를 쳐다봤다.
그 모든 상황이 슬로우모션으로 지나가다 그 아이가 내 옆을 스칠때 난 본다.

Boston

Massachubetts.

그리고는 Inception에서 디카프리오가 '킥'을 사용해 꿈에서 깬것처럼
나도 금방 깼다.



난 캘리포니아에 그리도 오래 있었으면서 이상하게 보스턴 생각을 참 많이 한다.
아마 너무 짧고 즐거웠던 1년동안 더 애틋한 마음이 쌓여서 그랬나보다.
그렇게 가고싶어했고, 결국은 갔고,
역시나 가슴을 콩닥이게하던 모습이라 그랬나보다.

"언니, 나 1년만 더 있었어도 정말 더 편하게, 더 즐겁게 지낼 수 있을것 같았는데"

그 1년조차 없었더라면 지금 현재의 내 커리어도, 한국에서의 생활도 없었다.
인생은 참 섬세하고 계략적인가보다. 나를 만들어 나가는 과정에서 불필요했던 사건/순간이 있었을까? 보스턴에서의 짧았던 생활도 지금 내 위치에서 어떤 의미를 가지고 있는지를 조금씩 깨달아 가며, 나에게 주어젔던 그 1년이 정말 필요한 시간이었다 말한다.

who sent me the flowers?

1. 생리 욕구

2. 안전 욕구

3. 소속감과 사랑에 대한 욕구

4. 인정을 받으려는 욕구

5. 자기실현의 욕구



According to David Marslow (Ph.D. in psychology), people feel most rewarded when they reach self-actualization. The diagram above explains his theory on the hierarchy of needs, and as you can see, the bottom of the pyramid describes people's most basic and necessary desire--desire to live--then travel up to more complex levels of cognitive and emotional definition of fulfillment--and in an exchangeable term, pleasure.


We are most satisfied when our work is, when our entirety is, recognized by us, ourselves.
Of course, the power of compliments and incentives are highly robust in themselves and in all their variant forms, but we ultimately decide that "we like what we like."

How many times have we tried to decorate ourselves so we please others' eyes?
How often do we struggle to fit our world into others' framework?

Needless to say, we are mighty in our malleability when it comes to socializing. We accept, adapt, glide, and finally, adjust. What is more scary is the fact that we can easily settle with our adjusted self. (한국에서는 그게 특히 더 심하다) The limitation comes short when our measurement of happiness is heavily dependent on others' rulers: the phrase "nothing lasts forever" applies to people's values and attractions so we will constantly be out of breath, running the never ending chase of popularity.

What is self-actualization?
It is NOT when you obtain authority, respect, and envy, but rather, it is when you are able to ascertain your self-ruling, liberated being through display of love, generosity, and service.

내가 나의 진실된 내면을 들여다 보았을때 나를 이해할 수 있다면 그때 느껴지는 성취감은 그 어떤 칭찬에서 오는 보상보다도 클것이다. 그리고 그 진실됨은 우리가 어떤 대상에게 사랑을 퍼줄때 가장 현저하게 드러난다고 생각한다. 사랑을 베풀며 나의 존재에 의미를 구현해 나갈때, 그렇게 나란 아이를 더 채워나갈때 가장 투명한 행복이 느껴지는것 같다.

그래서 사랑은 "심오한 진리 깨달은 자도 울리는 징"과 같고
"천사의 말을 하는 사람도 사랑없이는 소용이 없다" 하나보다.

Google search: 이문세 가을이 오면 4shared

My birthday has been always associated with an ending of some kind.
End of summer,
End of the break,
Goodbye to friends,
Letting go.

But as always, new things begin at the end of one door.

The new season clicked in.
School started.
and a tornado came (and went).
I wonder if Silvina was able to fly last night.


가을은 열심히 오고있나?

9월이 시작되면서 속에서 무언가가 꿈틀거린다.

눈을 지긋이 감고
썩기 직전의 낙엽 냄새를 맡으며
가로수길을 걸을 때가 돌아온다는 뜻이다.

조금 더 아삭해진 공기를 마시며 관악산으로 등산을 갈때가 되어간다는 뜻이다.
아님 장태산에 갔다 오는길에 찐빵이나 먹을까요.